Funny Status Updates

1. " I m good in bed so I sleep a lot. . . . ."
2. "An alcoholic is anyone you don't like who drinks more than you do."
3. Funny gal ,if I say her " i love you lots " she says " yes, even i love myself. . ."
4. Love all ; hate none… see all ; select one...
5. "Today is Valentine's Day. Or ,as men like to call it , Extortion day."
6. "It is never too late to be what you might have been."
7. "A goal without a plan is just a wish. . . . . . ."
8. “Forget The Times You Walked By, Forget The Times You’ve Made Me Cry, Forget The Time You Held My Hand, Forget The Sweet Things If I Can,
9. I Can No Longer Pretend, I Have To Remember Now That You’re Just A Friend.
10. " Any man who can drive safely while kissing a pretty girl is simply not giving the kiss the attention it deserves . . . "
11. "The most important thing in life is to learn how to give out love and let it come in. . . . ."
12. "A woman has got to love a bad man once or twice in her life , to be thankful for a good one"
13. She said "if you were my boyfrd and nevr stopped drinking, I would poison your drink." ---- I replied ," if you were my galfrd, I would drink it........"
14. " Love is wat makes two people sit in middle of bench wen der is plenty of room at both ends. . . ."
15. You cannot give a kiss without taking and cannot take without giving. . . . . . . .
16. Quote for Youth : " We all love facebook but hate to face the book. . . . . . ."
17. “Alcohol may be man's worst enemy, but the bible says love your enemy.”
18. Fact: " The first beer of every persons life was not bought on his own money. . . ."
19. To find out a girl's faults, praise her to her friends. . .
20. If a girl loves a guy, he will always be on her mind every minute of the day, even though she flirts with other guys
21. When a girl cries, the world is convinced of her .But when a boy cries, "Come on man! Don't be a girl".
22. If a red house is made from red bricks and a blue house is made from blue bricks and a pink house is made from pink bricks and a black bricks, what is a greenhouse made from?
23. Strange " When parents care its restriction......But wen galfrd restricts it's caring..........."
24. "If ur galfrd doesn't know what she wants." "You're lucky.Bec mine does."
25. Comments should be like skirts. Short enough to keep your attention, but long enough to cover the subject. . .