1. Comments should be like skirts. Short enough to keep your attention, but long enough to cover the subject. . .

2. Don't make love by the garden gate. Love is blind, but the neighbors are not.

3. Easy to criticize an egg, difficult to lay one

4. My school love story . ."I never did my homework so tat they made me stand on bench and I cud always c her whole day. . "

5. As life goes on I'm starting to learn more and more about responsibility

6. I realize everything I do may b is affecting the people around me

7. So I want to take this time out and apologize for things I have done

8. And the things they don't want to take responsibility for.....

9. They say Beauty and intelligence do not go hand in hand . . . . Join me baby lets prove it wrong. . . .

10. “Forget The Times You Walked By, Forget The Times You’ve Made Me Cry, Forget The Time You Held My Hand, Forget The Sweet Things If I Can,

10. I Can No Longer Pretend, I Have To Remember Now That You’re Just A Friend”

12. Smile, it’s the second best thing you can do with your lips

13. Nothing hurts more than realizing she meant everything to you, but you meant nothing to her.

14. "Never allow someone to be your priority , while allowing yourself to be their option"

15. I’m at the age where I want two girls. In case I fall asleep they will have someone to talk to.

16. Me and my galfrd are inseparable. Sometimes, it takes three or four people to pull us apart

17. Alcohol doesn't solve any problems...but then again, neither does milk.

18. If practice makes perfect, and nobody's perfect, why practice?

19. Life's like a bird, it's pretty cute until it shits on your head.

20. Knowledge talks.................................. wisdom listens.

21. A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man.

22. Hey I just realized this, but you look alot like my next girlfriend.....

23. "Never expect a lot from people who love u.......They Love u......Isn't that enough .......???????????"

24. "Early to bed , Early to rise and your galfrd goes out with other guys. . . . . . ."

25. Love is what makes two people sit in the middle of a bench when there is plenty of room at both ends.......

26. True love does not come by finding the perfect person, but by learning to see an imperfect person perfectly.

27. A foolish man tells a woman to stop talking, but a wise man tells her that she looks extremely beautiful wen her lips r closed. . . . .

28. "The early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese"

29. You know the speed of light, so what's the speed of dark?

30. "A man falls in love through his eyes, a woman through her ears. "

Funny Status Updates

1. " I m good in bed so I sleep a lot. . . . ."
2. "An alcoholic is anyone you don't like who drinks more than you do."
3. Funny gal ,if I say her " i love you lots " she says " yes, even i love myself. . ."
4. Love all ; hate none… see all ; select one...
5. "Today is Valentine's Day. Or ,as men like to call it , Extortion day."
6. "It is never too late to be what you might have been."
7. "A goal without a plan is just a wish. . . . . . ."
8. “Forget The Times You Walked By, Forget The Times You’ve Made Me Cry, Forget The Time You Held My Hand, Forget The Sweet Things If I Can,
9. I Can No Longer Pretend, I Have To Remember Now That You’re Just A Friend.
10. " Any man who can drive safely while kissing a pretty girl is simply not giving the kiss the attention it deserves . . . "
11. "The most important thing in life is to learn how to give out love and let it come in. . . . ."
12. "A woman has got to love a bad man once or twice in her life , to be thankful for a good one"
13. She said "if you were my boyfrd and nevr stopped drinking, I would poison your drink." ---- I replied ," if you were my galfrd, I would drink it........"
14. " Love is wat makes two people sit in middle of bench wen der is plenty of room at both ends. . . ."
15. You cannot give a kiss without taking and cannot take without giving. . . . . . . .
16. Quote for Youth : " We all love facebook but hate to face the book. . . . . . ."
17. “Alcohol may be man's worst enemy, but the bible says love your enemy.”
18. Fact: " The first beer of every persons life was not bought on his own money. . . ."
19. To find out a girl's faults, praise her to her friends. . .
20. If a girl loves a guy, he will always be on her mind every minute of the day, even though she flirts with other guys
21. When a girl cries, the world is convinced of her .But when a boy cries, "Come on man! Don't be a girl".
22. If a red house is made from red bricks and a blue house is made from blue bricks and a pink house is made from pink bricks and a black bricks, what is a greenhouse made from?
23. Strange " When parents care its restriction......But wen galfrd restricts it's caring..........."
24. "If ur galfrd doesn't know what she wants." "You're lucky.Bec mine does."
25. Comments should be like skirts. Short enough to keep your attention, but long enough to cover the subject. . .